Thursday 6 April 2017

651 The Thorn Birds


First  viewed  :  7  January  1984

BBC  One's  screening  of  this  US  miniseries was  very  controversial  with  many  critics  seeing  it  as  a  watershed  cultural  moment. Garbage  like  Triangle  and  The  Borgias  could  be  excused  as  not  having  turned  out  as  well  as  hoped  but  in  the  case  of  The  Thorn  Birds , Michael  Grade  saw  the  finished  product  and  purchased  it  as  a  ratings  buster. The  Beeb's  reputation  has  never  been  quite  the  same  since.

Colleen  McCullough's  novel  is  airport  trash  so  at  least  you  could  say  this  was  a  faithful  adaptation . It  concerns  a priest  Ralph  de  Bricassart  exiled  to  a  remote  parish  in  Australia  ministering  to  a  large   Catholic  family  the  Clearys. The  father  is  only  a  blacksmith  but  he  has  a  very  wealthy  sister  Mary  who  wants  to  share  her  sins  with  Ralph  but  not  in  the  confessional  booth. For  his  part,  Ralph  is  more  interested  in  the  Cleary's  only  daughter  Meggie. Mary  reacts  to  his  spurning  by  making  a  huge  bequest  to  the  church  which  leads  to  Ralph  becoming  a  cardinal  but  that  doesn't  stop  him  bonking  Meggie.

The  shortcomings  of  the  plot  were  vastly  exacerbated  by  the  casting. Richard  Chamberlain  was  nearly  50  and  utterly  unconvincing  as  the  young  priest.  Venerable  actress  Barbara  Stanwyck,   who  played  Mary,  was  pushing  80  and  her  attempted  seduction  scenes  with  Ralph  threatened  to  bring  up  your  dinner. Jean  Simmons  as  the  Cleary  mum  was  getting  pregnant  at  55.  Rachel  Ward  was  a  suitable  age  for  Meggie  but  a  diabolical  actress. There  were  one  or  two  decent  performances  from  Bryan  Brown  as  Meggie's  cuckolded  husband  and  Christopher  Plummer  as  Ralph's  Vatican  mentor  but  nothing  could  save  this  from  being  risible  melodrama .

Unfortunately,  it  was  very  popular and,  as  we  shall  see,  spawned  a  host  of  imitations  for  the  rest  of  the  decade.

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